Tuesday, June 29, 2004
On Duties
D. took the kids to see Shrek 2 today, so I finally got to write my thank-you notes while the baby took a (too short) nap. Two months after the baby was born and I'm finally able to carry out some of my social duties. I have to say that that is one of the hardest parts of having a new baby: trying to keep up your role as a member of a community and a society when the most important (and insistent!) person in your life wants you all to herself every waking moment, kind of like an obsessive/abusive boyfriend straight out of DeGrassi.
I'm a little bit anti-social by nature anyway, but I do still feel the need to be part of a larger circle than the one within our home. So I've gone ahead and had a book club meeting, and a couple of low-keys dinners with friends, and this week we're planning a party for my daughter's birthday. Last Saturday we went to two parties all the way in the Laurentians -- a very big deal! It feels necessary, somehow, to do these things, particularly because it's summer and summer is too short. But I do wonder why I don't just stay alone with the baby and kids for these first few months. Am I exhausting myself just to remind myself that I still have a life outside of breast-feeding and placating the angry baby god?
Why do I feel I've got to do it all, not to mention exercise and lose weight and look good and play with and read to my older kids and make my husband feel valued and loved, not necessarily in that order. (but isn't the order interesting?)
D. took the kids to see Shrek 2 today, so I finally got to write my thank-you notes while the baby took a (too short) nap. Two months after the baby was born and I'm finally able to carry out some of my social duties. I have to say that that is one of the hardest parts of having a new baby: trying to keep up your role as a member of a community and a society when the most important (and insistent!) person in your life wants you all to herself every waking moment, kind of like an obsessive/abusive boyfriend straight out of DeGrassi.
I'm a little bit anti-social by nature anyway, but I do still feel the need to be part of a larger circle than the one within our home. So I've gone ahead and had a book club meeting, and a couple of low-keys dinners with friends, and this week we're planning a party for my daughter's birthday. Last Saturday we went to two parties all the way in the Laurentians -- a very big deal! It feels necessary, somehow, to do these things, particularly because it's summer and summer is too short. But I do wonder why I don't just stay alone with the baby and kids for these first few months. Am I exhausting myself just to remind myself that I still have a life outside of breast-feeding and placating the angry baby god?
Why do I feel I've got to do it all, not to mention exercise and lose weight and look good and play with and read to my older kids and make my husband feel valued and loved, not necessarily in that order. (but isn't the order interesting?)