Saturday, December 31, 2005
Enough with the schmaltz!
Okay. The blog is officially out of the Christmas-special zone, where everybody hugs and forgives and, wait... did we just spy a twinkling light and hear a faint ring of sleighbells outside the window?
We're having a little New Year's Eve get-together tonight, and I made the mistake of saying it was a dinner. Now I have to cook, and my house is so messy I don't know where to start. Looks like the lights will be turned low and some prepared foodstuffs might find their way onto my table. Whenever I plan something like this, I see myself cleaning and cooking in an empty house, humming to myself and smiling. Why? That's not my reality! I never cook without a toddler at my knee, either yelling or asking repeatedly to nurse. It's never relaxing, never fun, never meditative. What was I thinking?
Will it all turn out well in the end? Tune in next time to the reality-TV hit, The Mommy! (it's just like The Nanny, but the chick who looks after the kids isn't as cute. Plus, she actually looks after the kids, sort of.)
Okay. The blog is officially out of the Christmas-special zone, where everybody hugs and forgives and, wait... did we just spy a twinkling light and hear a faint ring of sleighbells outside the window?
We're having a little New Year's Eve get-together tonight, and I made the mistake of saying it was a dinner. Now I have to cook, and my house is so messy I don't know where to start. Looks like the lights will be turned low and some prepared foodstuffs might find their way onto my table. Whenever I plan something like this, I see myself cleaning and cooking in an empty house, humming to myself and smiling. Why? That's not my reality! I never cook without a toddler at my knee, either yelling or asking repeatedly to nurse. It's never relaxing, never fun, never meditative. What was I thinking?
Will it all turn out well in the end? Tune in next time to the reality-TV hit, The Mommy! (it's just like The Nanny, but the chick who looks after the kids isn't as cute. Plus, she actually looks after the kids, sort of.)
Thursday, December 29, 2005
And so that was Christmas (2005)
It's not just a cliche; the Christmas I have just experienced was full of joy, love, peace and beauty, just like the cards say.
We are in heaven, right here. I'm sure there are plenty of people who can only dream of having just one Christmas like we have every year, with little children who believe in Santa Claus, a baby who kisses the tree decorations and runs around the room with her new sippy cup singing "milk! milk!", and at my Mom's house on boxing day, a big happy family singing carols with our bellies full of a delicious Christmas feast.
I'm counting my blessings and trying to live like I'm grateful for it all, because I am.
It's not just a cliche; the Christmas I have just experienced was full of joy, love, peace and beauty, just like the cards say.
We are in heaven, right here. I'm sure there are plenty of people who can only dream of having just one Christmas like we have every year, with little children who believe in Santa Claus, a baby who kisses the tree decorations and runs around the room with her new sippy cup singing "milk! milk!", and at my Mom's house on boxing day, a big happy family singing carols with our bellies full of a delicious Christmas feast.
I'm counting my blessings and trying to live like I'm grateful for it all, because I am.
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Bizzy, bizzy, bizzzeeee...
The Christmas spirit has descended on our household. As I write this in front of the tree, D. is dancing with the baby, my big daughter is colouring in a card and my son is upstairs wrapping his gifts. La vita e bella.
I wish all my friends and family, and anyone else who stumbles upon this, a very happy time over the holidays and a safe, peaceful and contented new year.
The Christmas spirit has descended on our household. As I write this in front of the tree, D. is dancing with the baby, my big daughter is colouring in a card and my son is upstairs wrapping his gifts. La vita e bella.
I wish all my friends and family, and anyone else who stumbles upon this, a very happy time over the holidays and a safe, peaceful and contented new year.
Monday, December 19, 2005
Post-Pageant acquaintances
My kids and I were walking down the street in our neighbourhood the other day when I spotted a familiar face. Walking towards us were a mother and grandmother with a little baby in a pram. "Look guys, it's baby Jesus!" I said, at the same time as the woman and her mother exclaimed "Look! It's the virgin Mary!", pointing to my daughter. We met up and talked a little, the grandmother echoing the thoughts of many who attended that my daughter was, in fact, the most perfect Mary ever, because she "looks like someone in a Renaissance painting! And so serious!" Being a nice person and not a pedant, I refrained from pointing out that Mary probably didn't have blond hair and creamy white skin. Besides, I like hearing how lovely my daughter is.
As we walked away, my son mused that "We still don't know what those people's real names are."
My kids and I were walking down the street in our neighbourhood the other day when I spotted a familiar face. Walking towards us were a mother and grandmother with a little baby in a pram. "Look guys, it's baby Jesus!" I said, at the same time as the woman and her mother exclaimed "Look! It's the virgin Mary!", pointing to my daughter. We met up and talked a little, the grandmother echoing the thoughts of many who attended that my daughter was, in fact, the most perfect Mary ever, because she "looks like someone in a Renaissance painting! And so serious!" Being a nice person and not a pedant, I refrained from pointing out that Mary probably didn't have blond hair and creamy white skin. Besides, I like hearing how lovely my daughter is.
As we walked away, my son mused that "We still don't know what those people's real names are."
Whew!
After accomplishing none of my Christmas preparations, and feeling none of the spirit of Christmas, I embarked on this past weekend determined to go all out and get it all (or some of it anyway) done, so that I could start relaxing into the whole holiday thang.
Saturday was a day for staying at home, mostly because the mountains of snow outside were still, well, mountains of snow outside. We did our decorating, tree and wee village and creche and the twinkly lights and the coloured candles, etc. I also did Phase One of my Christmas baking, which is stuff for us and our guests. Phase Two is gift baking for others.
Sunday was house cleaning and the dread-filled Christmas shopping day. The shopping wasn't too bad, as we chose an out-of-the-way place that wasn't crowded, and I just went nuts with my shopping cart while D. distracted the older kids by taking them to a pet store and to see Santa.
All of this activity was done to the low hum of our new washing machine, working constantly to catch up on an entire week's worth of laundry. Our old machine broke last weekend, so we finally went even further into debt (!) and bought a new (floor model, but still new) machine. I feel so guilty for having something new, but I must admit that I sneak down the basement stairs whenever I get a chance just to gaze upon its shining surface and neat knobs.
A note about the snowfall and no-school day on Friday: My son spent 7 hours straight outside, no exaggeration, most of it shoveling snow, with some fort building and snowball fighting thrown in. When we were shoveling together to make a space for D.'s car, the little guy told me "I like to work, that's all!" He certainly does. Being his mother I had to find something to worry and nag about, so I hassled him about not eating or drinking enough. Hey, I like to nag, that's all!
After accomplishing none of my Christmas preparations, and feeling none of the spirit of Christmas, I embarked on this past weekend determined to go all out and get it all (or some of it anyway) done, so that I could start relaxing into the whole holiday thang.
Saturday was a day for staying at home, mostly because the mountains of snow outside were still, well, mountains of snow outside. We did our decorating, tree and wee village and creche and the twinkly lights and the coloured candles, etc. I also did Phase One of my Christmas baking, which is stuff for us and our guests. Phase Two is gift baking for others.
Sunday was house cleaning and the dread-filled Christmas shopping day. The shopping wasn't too bad, as we chose an out-of-the-way place that wasn't crowded, and I just went nuts with my shopping cart while D. distracted the older kids by taking them to a pet store and to see Santa.
All of this activity was done to the low hum of our new washing machine, working constantly to catch up on an entire week's worth of laundry. Our old machine broke last weekend, so we finally went even further into debt (!) and bought a new (floor model, but still new) machine. I feel so guilty for having something new, but I must admit that I sneak down the basement stairs whenever I get a chance just to gaze upon its shining surface and neat knobs.
A note about the snowfall and no-school day on Friday: My son spent 7 hours straight outside, no exaggeration, most of it shoveling snow, with some fort building and snowball fighting thrown in. When we were shoveling together to make a space for D.'s car, the little guy told me "I like to work, that's all!" He certainly does. Being his mother I had to find something to worry and nag about, so I hassled him about not eating or drinking enough. Hey, I like to nag, that's all!
Thursday, December 15, 2005
The brighter side of life
Remember that I said something good might be in the works? Well, it looks like I've managed to work out the details. I've been asked to do a job that I've always wanted to do; kind of a dream job, and it's part-time and a lot of it can even be done from home. The downside, maybe, is that it only lasts until the first week of April. But that's okay with me. Financially, this is a bit of a reprieve, and for me personally it's a welcome diversion from a long winter of stay-at-home mothering. That's all to the good, and when it's over maybe something else will come along.
Remember that I said something good might be in the works? Well, it looks like I've managed to work out the details. I've been asked to do a job that I've always wanted to do; kind of a dream job, and it's part-time and a lot of it can even be done from home. The downside, maybe, is that it only lasts until the first week of April. But that's okay with me. Financially, this is a bit of a reprieve, and for me personally it's a welcome diversion from a long winter of stay-at-home mothering. That's all to the good, and when it's over maybe something else will come along.
Monday, December 12, 2005
So sad
My aunt Pat died suddenly on Saturday night. The cause of her death is shrouded in secrecy, but it appears to have been cancer.
Pat was married to my uncle Hector, my father's brother. When she was in her 30s, in the early 1960s, her first husband left her with 3 children. Although she was the daughter of a well-off family, she had to fend for herself and her boys, so she took some of her money and bought a boarding house, which she ran single-handedly for several years while raising her sons. Then she met my uncle, a divorced father of one and an officer in the merchant navy. They fell madly in love and married quickly, both of them swept off their feet by the intensity of their connection to one another. But what to do? Hector spent most of his time sailing around the world. How could they be together? Well, Pat took her 3 boys and went with him, sailing on a merchant navy ship. It was the time of her life: She home-schooled her boys and spent the rest of her time sunning herself on the deck of the boat, playing card games with the sailors and generally acting as a mother/sister/pin-up girl for the rest of the crew on board -- sewing and knitting things for the men and their families and sharing tea and sympathy -- and nightly cocktail hours, of course -- with the men. She was the only woman on board and the men all loved her. When the ship docked, Pat and Hector and the boys sampled the cultures of all the continents of the world, visiting Africa and Asia when they were still mysterious and inaccessible to most travellers. There is a wonderful photo of Hector and Pat with Haile Salassie, the Lion of Judah, with a real live male lion lying at his feet.
When they returned to England and settled down to a more regular life, they carried the romance and adventure of those sailing days into their everyday life. Hector raised Pat's boys as though they were his own, and grieved with her when one of her sons died an untimely death. Every morning, Hector brought a tray with tea and toast and the newspaper to Pat in her bed and she read and did the crossword and then rose to take a bath and get on with her busy day of looking after him and their poodles and doing volunteer work in her small community in the South of England.
Pat was beautiful, funny, quick to laugh loudly, and she spoke with a delicious upper-crust accent, frequently taking pulls on her cigarette as she listened to you, nodding her head and saying "Quite, quiiite", every now and then, like some gorgeous character in a black-and-white movie. She always wore makeup and had long painted nails, and she was fit and ultra-competent and took care of everyone around her. I only spent a total of about a month with her in my life, but I loved her. She was the kind of woman I could only hope to be, brave and smart and generous and glamourous as hell.
My aunt Pat died suddenly on Saturday night. The cause of her death is shrouded in secrecy, but it appears to have been cancer.
Pat was married to my uncle Hector, my father's brother. When she was in her 30s, in the early 1960s, her first husband left her with 3 children. Although she was the daughter of a well-off family, she had to fend for herself and her boys, so she took some of her money and bought a boarding house, which she ran single-handedly for several years while raising her sons. Then she met my uncle, a divorced father of one and an officer in the merchant navy. They fell madly in love and married quickly, both of them swept off their feet by the intensity of their connection to one another. But what to do? Hector spent most of his time sailing around the world. How could they be together? Well, Pat took her 3 boys and went with him, sailing on a merchant navy ship. It was the time of her life: She home-schooled her boys and spent the rest of her time sunning herself on the deck of the boat, playing card games with the sailors and generally acting as a mother/sister/pin-up girl for the rest of the crew on board -- sewing and knitting things for the men and their families and sharing tea and sympathy -- and nightly cocktail hours, of course -- with the men. She was the only woman on board and the men all loved her. When the ship docked, Pat and Hector and the boys sampled the cultures of all the continents of the world, visiting Africa and Asia when they were still mysterious and inaccessible to most travellers. There is a wonderful photo of Hector and Pat with Haile Salassie, the Lion of Judah, with a real live male lion lying at his feet.
When they returned to England and settled down to a more regular life, they carried the romance and adventure of those sailing days into their everyday life. Hector raised Pat's boys as though they were his own, and grieved with her when one of her sons died an untimely death. Every morning, Hector brought a tray with tea and toast and the newspaper to Pat in her bed and she read and did the crossword and then rose to take a bath and get on with her busy day of looking after him and their poodles and doing volunteer work in her small community in the South of England.
Pat was beautiful, funny, quick to laugh loudly, and she spoke with a delicious upper-crust accent, frequently taking pulls on her cigarette as she listened to you, nodding her head and saying "Quite, quiiite", every now and then, like some gorgeous character in a black-and-white movie. She always wore makeup and had long painted nails, and she was fit and ultra-competent and took care of everyone around her. I only spent a total of about a month with her in my life, but I loved her. She was the kind of woman I could only hope to be, brave and smart and generous and glamourous as hell.
Saturday, December 10, 2005
WOOHOO-ssshhh! woohooo...
I don't want to jinx it, cuz it's not final yet, but something good might be in the works...
yay!
I don't want to jinx it, cuz it's not final yet, but something good might be in the works...
yay!
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
The splinter in thy neighbour's eye
Why do people feel so ready to judge parents, on no evidence, and find them negligent or worse? Sometimes the most judgmental are other parents, but old ladies really take the cake on this one.
Let's all give each other the benefit of the doubt this Christmas, huh? Whaddya say?
Why do people feel so ready to judge parents, on no evidence, and find them negligent or worse? Sometimes the most judgmental are other parents, but old ladies really take the cake on this one.
Let's all give each other the benefit of the doubt this Christmas, huh? Whaddya say?
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Our Church
My kids performed in the Christmas pageant at our church this morning. It was brilliant-- funny, cute, with a real baby Jesus that my daughter got to cuddle because she was, you guessed it, Mary. Awww. She did a fabulous job in a pretty major role. My son was a soldier and looked totally adorable in a red jacket with gold braid and big gold buttons and a tall black hat with gold braid on it. He saluted at the end of the pageant and made people giggle.
I really enjoy going to our church. It's a United church and the minister is a man in his 40s who has three teenage sons and a wife who is also a minister (at another church). The choir is wonderful, there's a pipe organ and the music is always gorgeous. The minister's sermons are very intelligent and well-thought-out and delivered. Almost every week there is something thought-provoking in the sermon that gives me something to chew on for the rest of the day. There's a wonderful sense of community in this congregation, and lots of social-justice and charitable activity going on all the time, led by some truly inspiring civic-minded and just plain kind people. What's also interesting is the large and active group of teenagers. This is something I've never seen in a church and it says something very positive about the minister and the congregation. The sunday school is very active and fun for the kids, and they are really an integral part of the rest of the congregation. The church wouldn't be the same without all of the happy young things running around.
It's becoming a second home for my kids, and every Sunday, without fail, I experience something very joyful in my time there. At least once every week I have tears in my eyes (usually from the music, but sometimes from witnessing something moving), every week I have a laugh, and at the end of the service I feel somehow -- I don't know, I don't want to say "cleansed" because of the connotations of sinfulness -- but I do feel sort of rinsed out and ready to commit myself to doing good in the world in some small way. What more could you ask for in a church experience?
Some other time I'll tell you about my history with church, and how I stayed away for a long time, and what my spiritual search is about. But I thought I'd tell you a little bit about this part of my life and what it means to me.
My kids performed in the Christmas pageant at our church this morning. It was brilliant-- funny, cute, with a real baby Jesus that my daughter got to cuddle because she was, you guessed it, Mary. Awww. She did a fabulous job in a pretty major role. My son was a soldier and looked totally adorable in a red jacket with gold braid and big gold buttons and a tall black hat with gold braid on it. He saluted at the end of the pageant and made people giggle.
I really enjoy going to our church. It's a United church and the minister is a man in his 40s who has three teenage sons and a wife who is also a minister (at another church). The choir is wonderful, there's a pipe organ and the music is always gorgeous. The minister's sermons are very intelligent and well-thought-out and delivered. Almost every week there is something thought-provoking in the sermon that gives me something to chew on for the rest of the day. There's a wonderful sense of community in this congregation, and lots of social-justice and charitable activity going on all the time, led by some truly inspiring civic-minded and just plain kind people. What's also interesting is the large and active group of teenagers. This is something I've never seen in a church and it says something very positive about the minister and the congregation. The sunday school is very active and fun for the kids, and they are really an integral part of the rest of the congregation. The church wouldn't be the same without all of the happy young things running around.
It's becoming a second home for my kids, and every Sunday, without fail, I experience something very joyful in my time there. At least once every week I have tears in my eyes (usually from the music, but sometimes from witnessing something moving), every week I have a laugh, and at the end of the service I feel somehow -- I don't know, I don't want to say "cleansed" because of the connotations of sinfulness -- but I do feel sort of rinsed out and ready to commit myself to doing good in the world in some small way. What more could you ask for in a church experience?
Some other time I'll tell you about my history with church, and how I stayed away for a long time, and what my spiritual search is about. But I thought I'd tell you a little bit about this part of my life and what it means to me.
