Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Limbo land
Our life is in a "transition period" yet again -- just to keep us on our toes, y'know? D. has started a new shift at work that has him working from 2 to 10 week nights (including Friday, which has been "our night" for a couple of years now. Me sad.). The change has its mix of good and bad; D. gets to see a lot more of our littlest one, who is home with me (and now him). He doesn't see all that much of the older kids, just mornings before school. The evenings are hard on me, because it means homework, supper, baths, bed, lunch preparation and clean-up are all my responsibility, where we used to share the work.
Also, D. is going to go back to school in January and I have to find a job. Either part-time or full-time, but no matter what, I must work to increase our family income because we are living in the red. I can't complain about this; I've had almost 10 years without working full-time. I don't really want to work full-time, but if a great job came up and it demanded my full-time commitment, I would take it. D. would be the at-home parent, going to school part-time. Oy. Just thinking about it gives me a headache, but the present situation is just not tenable, so we gots to do somethin'.
Ideally I would get something part-time that pays reasonably well. That's worked well in the past, and might be possible now. Anyway, in the words of Camper Van Beethoven, "Everything seems to be up in the air at this time."
Our life is in a "transition period" yet again -- just to keep us on our toes, y'know? D. has started a new shift at work that has him working from 2 to 10 week nights (including Friday, which has been "our night" for a couple of years now. Me sad.). The change has its mix of good and bad; D. gets to see a lot more of our littlest one, who is home with me (and now him). He doesn't see all that much of the older kids, just mornings before school. The evenings are hard on me, because it means homework, supper, baths, bed, lunch preparation and clean-up are all my responsibility, where we used to share the work.
Also, D. is going to go back to school in January and I have to find a job. Either part-time or full-time, but no matter what, I must work to increase our family income because we are living in the red. I can't complain about this; I've had almost 10 years without working full-time. I don't really want to work full-time, but if a great job came up and it demanded my full-time commitment, I would take it. D. would be the at-home parent, going to school part-time. Oy. Just thinking about it gives me a headache, but the present situation is just not tenable, so we gots to do somethin'.
Ideally I would get something part-time that pays reasonably well. That's worked well in the past, and might be possible now. Anyway, in the words of Camper Van Beethoven, "Everything seems to be up in the air at this time."
Friday, September 22, 2006
This is shooting fish in a barrel
I actually laughed out loud yesterday at a clip I heard in a radio news item. The story was about how our "New Government" (have you heard about that ridiculous to-do?) wants to enact a kind of 3-strikes-you're-out legislation similar to the US's, but without the death penalty. (Isn't it kind of funny how they use a baseball term for something that ends in an execution?) The people who run Canada's jails immediately reacted to this bonehead initiative saying that there's no room in our prisons as it is, and unless you're willing to build more prisons, this legislation would be a very very bad idea. The government's response (and this is what made me laugh, at the sheer willful ignorance of it) was that the legislation will act as a deterrent, and therefore there will be fewer people committing crimes and going to jail. Now, I've seen maybe 2 documentaries on prisons in my life, and would happily admit that I'm an ignoramous on the subject, but even I know that the 3 strikes law in the States hasn't acted as a deterrent. I'll bet there are reams of studies to show what a bad idea it was in the first place and how it's bunged up the prison system real good, to speak eloquently.
How stupid are the people in this (gack!) conservative government, and how stupid are the people who voted them in to power?
I actually laughed out loud yesterday at a clip I heard in a radio news item. The story was about how our "New Government" (have you heard about that ridiculous to-do?) wants to enact a kind of 3-strikes-you're-out legislation similar to the US's, but without the death penalty. (Isn't it kind of funny how they use a baseball term for something that ends in an execution?) The people who run Canada's jails immediately reacted to this bonehead initiative saying that there's no room in our prisons as it is, and unless you're willing to build more prisons, this legislation would be a very very bad idea. The government's response (and this is what made me laugh, at the sheer willful ignorance of it) was that the legislation will act as a deterrent, and therefore there will be fewer people committing crimes and going to jail. Now, I've seen maybe 2 documentaries on prisons in my life, and would happily admit that I'm an ignoramous on the subject, but even I know that the 3 strikes law in the States hasn't acted as a deterrent. I'll bet there are reams of studies to show what a bad idea it was in the first place and how it's bunged up the prison system real good, to speak eloquently.
How stupid are the people in this (gack!) conservative government, and how stupid are the people who voted them in to power?
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Second thoughts
Some of you very astute readers may have noticed that I deleted the post that I wrote the day after last Wednesday's shootings at Dawson College.
I often experience twinges of self-doubt after posting to the blog; I guess that's pretty common and natural. With that post, however, I felt differently. After looking around the web at different blogs and reading the papers I decided that the world didn't need another comment on the whole bloody thing. I didn't regret saying that I felt terrible for the killer's parents; I still do. I also feel hideous for the parents of the poor girl who was killed and the parents of the injured kids, one of them still in critical condition. I just felt kinda sick of the "blogosphere" and all the knee-jerk reactions I read there every day. Normally I like that it's like that, that people just post what they're thinking and feeling, sometimes in response to a (very recent) major event. But sometimes I don't really want to be a part of all the empty blahdy-blah. Sometimes I hate blogs, even the good ones. That was one of those times. That's all.
Some of you very astute readers may have noticed that I deleted the post that I wrote the day after last Wednesday's shootings at Dawson College.
I often experience twinges of self-doubt after posting to the blog; I guess that's pretty common and natural. With that post, however, I felt differently. After looking around the web at different blogs and reading the papers I decided that the world didn't need another comment on the whole bloody thing. I didn't regret saying that I felt terrible for the killer's parents; I still do. I also feel hideous for the parents of the poor girl who was killed and the parents of the injured kids, one of them still in critical condition. I just felt kinda sick of the "blogosphere" and all the knee-jerk reactions I read there every day. Normally I like that it's like that, that people just post what they're thinking and feeling, sometimes in response to a (very recent) major event. But sometimes I don't really want to be a part of all the empty blahdy-blah. Sometimes I hate blogs, even the good ones. That was one of those times. That's all.
Monday, September 11, 2006
If my life were a book, this chapter would be called:
Motherhood
or
How can something this physically exhausting make you gain weight?
Friday, September 08, 2006
Summer hangs on!
It's warm and sunny and just perfect out there today. I took the little girl to one of our favourite libraries this morning and we had a great time. We went by bike, of course, and got some of books that I loved when I was little. One of them is "Ten Apples Up on Top". Remember that one?
One of the many wonderful things about having children is immersing yourself in children's literature. As well as revisiting some of my childhood favourites I've discovered many awesome newer books. We read stories every night before bed, and in the past couple of years the older kids have graduated to chapter books. Some of our favourites have been "The BFG" and the series that began with "The Stories Julian Tells". There's a whole stack of books waiting, among them the "Wrinkle in Time" trilogy, but I have to read at a level that appeals to a 7- and a 9-year-old, and the younger one gets bored when meanings go over his head. The older one does so much reading on her own, in French and English, that somewhat simpler books for bedtime are still fine, and a good story is a good story. We still read picture books, if they're particularly beautiful and especially if they contain poetry.
Incidentally, not all children's books are good books. Like any books, some of them really suck. But when they're really good there's a kind of magic about them.
It's warm and sunny and just perfect out there today. I took the little girl to one of our favourite libraries this morning and we had a great time. We went by bike, of course, and got some of books that I loved when I was little. One of them is "Ten Apples Up on Top". Remember that one?
One of the many wonderful things about having children is immersing yourself in children's literature. As well as revisiting some of my childhood favourites I've discovered many awesome newer books. We read stories every night before bed, and in the past couple of years the older kids have graduated to chapter books. Some of our favourites have been "The BFG" and the series that began with "The Stories Julian Tells". There's a whole stack of books waiting, among them the "Wrinkle in Time" trilogy, but I have to read at a level that appeals to a 7- and a 9-year-old, and the younger one gets bored when meanings go over his head. The older one does so much reading on her own, in French and English, that somewhat simpler books for bedtime are still fine, and a good story is a good story. We still read picture books, if they're particularly beautiful and especially if they contain poetry.
Incidentally, not all children's books are good books. Like any books, some of them really suck. But when they're really good there's a kind of magic about them.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
On marriage
Okay, so the site meter does work; I was just too stupid (duh!) to know it.
I've been thinking a lot lately about marriage and how things can fall apart and why some marriages last while others don't, regardless of the amount or nature of the love involved.
D. and I have been married for 11 years now, and things are good between us, maybe even great. I feel incredibly lucky to be with someone who is so perfect for me. I think about what it would be like if it all fell apart. The word that comes to me is Disaster. Everything in my life, all my hopes and plans for the future, everything I can imagine for myself is built upon the foundation of this marriage. For me total commitment equals total investment, so if we ever broke up I would be completely devastated, even if I did manage to continue on and manage my life and my family.
We've had hard times in our relationship. There was even a time where I saw how our marriage could fail, if we didn't do something about it. What could have killed it was the erosion of respect. Once our esteem and admiration for one another started to fail (the result of lots of petty things that added up), we were on the road to a place where we could say Fine, I'd be better off on my own (or with someone else). It takes work to get back to one another, to remember what it is that you value in one another. Perhaps the most difficult part is that it takes more forgiveness and humility than anyone ever thinks they're capable of.
A phrase that comes often to my mind, one that comes from Dr. Phil, strange to say, really does make more and more sense to me the more life I live: Do you want to be happy, or do you want to be right?
Okay, so the site meter does work; I was just too stupid (duh!) to know it.
I've been thinking a lot lately about marriage and how things can fall apart and why some marriages last while others don't, regardless of the amount or nature of the love involved.
D. and I have been married for 11 years now, and things are good between us, maybe even great. I feel incredibly lucky to be with someone who is so perfect for me. I think about what it would be like if it all fell apart. The word that comes to me is Disaster. Everything in my life, all my hopes and plans for the future, everything I can imagine for myself is built upon the foundation of this marriage. For me total commitment equals total investment, so if we ever broke up I would be completely devastated, even if I did manage to continue on and manage my life and my family.
We've had hard times in our relationship. There was even a time where I saw how our marriage could fail, if we didn't do something about it. What could have killed it was the erosion of respect. Once our esteem and admiration for one another started to fail (the result of lots of petty things that added up), we were on the road to a place where we could say Fine, I'd be better off on my own (or with someone else). It takes work to get back to one another, to remember what it is that you value in one another. Perhaps the most difficult part is that it takes more forgiveness and humility than anyone ever thinks they're capable of.
A phrase that comes often to my mind, one that comes from Dr. Phil, strange to say, really does make more and more sense to me the more life I live: Do you want to be happy, or do you want to be right?
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Misc. crap
Poor D. He spent about 6 hours yesterday doing a job that I insisted he do, a job that I figured would take about 2 hours, tops. We replaced our big orange behemoth of a fridge with a small white one given to us by our neighbour. We downsized our fridge capacity significantly. I always felt the big fridge was too big, and it was about 2/3 full of stuff we never touched, and I figure we only used the front 12 inches of the thing for our actual usable groceries. So in the interest of keeping energy consumption down and not having more than we need, we made the switch. We'll see if we regret it down the road, but it takes up so much less kitchen space and that's already a very good thing. Perhaps the best thing about it was the cleaning that we did in order to make the switch: Filthy floor is now sparkling, Junk baskets full of dead batteries, old watches and Canadian Tire money are now organized and much emptier, inside of both fridges are clean and the new one is positively sanitized.
It's insane how happy this makes me.
And the best thing of all? I found my wedding ring in the bottom of one of the junk baskets. I'm certain you could have seen my smile with Google Earth. I'll write a post about that whole 2-years-without-a-wedding-ring thing later.
To change the subject: I tried to install a "site meter", in order to give myself a laugh at the paltry number of visits this blog gets. It didn't work. You can see the rather sad little rectangle over to the right there, not looking like a site meter at all, and definitely not counting. Now I don't know how to remove it, and I sure as hell don't know what I did wrong. Oh well, I'll just make up a number of visits; let's say, um, 200, 586. Not bad eh?
Poor D. He spent about 6 hours yesterday doing a job that I insisted he do, a job that I figured would take about 2 hours, tops. We replaced our big orange behemoth of a fridge with a small white one given to us by our neighbour. We downsized our fridge capacity significantly. I always felt the big fridge was too big, and it was about 2/3 full of stuff we never touched, and I figure we only used the front 12 inches of the thing for our actual usable groceries. So in the interest of keeping energy consumption down and not having more than we need, we made the switch. We'll see if we regret it down the road, but it takes up so much less kitchen space and that's already a very good thing. Perhaps the best thing about it was the cleaning that we did in order to make the switch: Filthy floor is now sparkling, Junk baskets full of dead batteries, old watches and Canadian Tire money are now organized and much emptier, inside of both fridges are clean and the new one is positively sanitized.
It's insane how happy this makes me.
And the best thing of all? I found my wedding ring in the bottom of one of the junk baskets. I'm certain you could have seen my smile with Google Earth. I'll write a post about that whole 2-years-without-a-wedding-ring thing later.
To change the subject: I tried to install a "site meter", in order to give myself a laugh at the paltry number of visits this blog gets. It didn't work. You can see the rather sad little rectangle over to the right there, not looking like a site meter at all, and definitely not counting. Now I don't know how to remove it, and I sure as hell don't know what I did wrong. Oh well, I'll just make up a number of visits; let's say, um, 200, 586. Not bad eh?
Friday, September 01, 2006
Paean to a Letter Carrier
I've just sent off an e-mail to Canada Post, full of praise for our summer letter carrier. She came into our lives one sultry day, a vision in her pseudo-Mountie hat and hiking boots. Her long blond hair and big toothy smile melted our hearts, and her friendly conversation made our days that much sunnier. Her name was Laurie, and she really liked talking to the kids and finding out about them. To me she was respectful and professional, guaranteeing the safe delivery of our mail after many months of less-than-satisfactory service from a cavalcade of sullen, pasty-faced elastic-droppers. She would ring the bell and deliver the mail into our hands, just to say hi and have a little chat, giving us the scoop on any lemonade stands or cute dogs that she'd encountered on her appointed rounds.
She's gone now, back to her Anthropology courses and on her way to her goal of becoming a doctor. Godspeed Laurie!
You know, she was so friendly and professional I just assume she wasn't from Quebec. Why is that I wonder?
I've just sent off an e-mail to Canada Post, full of praise for our summer letter carrier. She came into our lives one sultry day, a vision in her pseudo-Mountie hat and hiking boots. Her long blond hair and big toothy smile melted our hearts, and her friendly conversation made our days that much sunnier. Her name was Laurie, and she really liked talking to the kids and finding out about them. To me she was respectful and professional, guaranteeing the safe delivery of our mail after many months of less-than-satisfactory service from a cavalcade of sullen, pasty-faced elastic-droppers. She would ring the bell and deliver the mail into our hands, just to say hi and have a little chat, giving us the scoop on any lemonade stands or cute dogs that she'd encountered on her appointed rounds.
She's gone now, back to her Anthropology courses and on her way to her goal of becoming a doctor. Godspeed Laurie!
You know, she was so friendly and professional I just assume she wasn't from Quebec. Why is that I wonder?
